Laurie's Journal

  The Cycle Ends Here: Why I’m Hitting Delete on Generational Negativity We all have them—those family heirlooms that nobody actually wants. I’m not talking about the chipped china or the dusty velvet sofa in the attic. I’m talking about the emotional inheritance : the cynicism, the "woe-is-me" outlook, and the habit of finding a storm cloud for every silver lining. In my family, negativity wasn't just a mood; it was a tradition. It was passed down like a secret recipe, seasoned with "life is hard" and "don't get your hopes up." But today, I’m hitting the delete button. The cycle stops with me. The Weight of the "Old Way" Generational negativity is a heavy coat that gets handed down from parent to child. You wear it because you watched them wear it. It sounds like: The "Waiting for the Other Shoe to Drop" Syndrome: Never fully enjoying a win because you’re convinced a disaster is right around the corner. The Critique Culture: ...

  The Ghost Behind the Door: Why "Moving On" Isn’t Enough We’ve all heard the clichés about letting go. People tell you to "turn the page," "close the chapter," or—my personal favorite—"carry the lessons, leave the baggage." But for years, that advice felt like a lie. I’d "let go" of a failed project, a bridge burned, or a version of myself I didn't like anymore, but I’d still keep a tiny key to that room in my pocket. I’d check the lock every once in a while just to make sure the ghosts were still there. Then, I had a revelation that changed everything. The Illusion of the Rearview Mirror The problem with traditional letting go is that we treat our past like a museum. We walk out of the exhibit, but we still believe the exhibit exists behind us. We assume that because we experienced it, it has a permanent residence in the universe. We think: I’ve moved on, but that mistake is still sitting back there on year 2022’s shelf. This cr...

  Surviving the 2026 "Super Flu": A Personal Battle with Biology and Bipolar If you’ve been following the news lately, you know that the subclade K (or the "Super Flu," as the headlines love to call it) is no joke. I spent the last two weeks in the trenches with it. But for those of us living with Bipolar Disorder , the virus is only half the battle. When the high fevers and body aches of this 2026 mega strain hit, they didn't just attack my lungs—they sent my brain into a tailspin. This is the story of how I survived the "Super Flu" while navigating the crushing weight of a sudden bipolar depressive episode. The Collision: When the Virus Triggers the Void They don’t tell you that severe physical illness is a massive physiological stressor that can snap a stable mood like a dry twig. By day three of the flu, my fever was spiking at 102°F , and the inflammation was doing more than making my joints ache—it felt like it was shutting down my dopamine rece...

  The "Snowpocalypse" That Wasn't: A Survival Guide to Weather Anxiety We’ve all seen the news graphics. You know the ones—where the meteorologist looks like they’re reporting from the bridge of a starship, pointing at a giant, swirling purple blob of doom heading straight for your driveway. They call it the "Storm of the Century." They use words like Bombogenesis and Snowmageddon . Naturally, we do what any rational human does: we sprint to the grocery store to fight an elderly woman for the last loaf of sourdough and buy enough milk to bathe in. Then, the big day arrives. You wake up, ready to tunnel your way out the front door, only to find… a very bright, very cold, very dry sidewalk. Not a flake. Just the sun mocking your three-gallon hoard of 2% milk. Fact vs. Myth: The Weather Edition Is meteorology a science? Sure. But sometimes it feels more like a chaotic improv show where the points don't matter. The Prediction The Reality "30 Inches of Pow...

  Totally Tubular Times: A Rad Look Back at the 80s (from the futuristic year of 2026!) Can you believe it's 2026? We've got self-driving cars, virtual reality vacations, and a smartwatch that practically reads your mind. And yet, sometimes, I find myself yearning for a simpler era, a time of big hair, bigger shoulder pads, and even bigger dreams: the 1980s. Now, before you scoff and tell me I'm romanticizing a decade of neon and questionable fashion choices, hear me out. Yes, we may have been in an "on-again, off-again" recession (a concept that feels quaint compared to today's economic roller coasters), but darn it, we were happy! We found joy in the little things, and maybe, just maybe, our lack of constant digital stimulation contributed to that. Let's talk fashion first, because how can you not? We thought we were the epitome of cool, rocking acid-wash jeans that were so stiff they could stand up on their own, and t-shirts emblazoned with slogans that...

  When the Fever Brings the Fog: Navigating the Flu and Mental Health Getting sick is never just "getting sick" for me. While most people complain about the aches and the chills—which, don’t get me wrong, are miserable—my biggest fear when I see those two pink lines on a COVID test or feel that tell-tale scratch in my throat is the mental slide. I am incredibly susceptible to falling into a major depressive episode when my physical health dips. For the past few days, the flu hasn't just attacked my lungs; it’s gone straight for my dopamine levels. When you’re stuck in bed, the silence becomes loud. The lack of productivity feels like a moral failing, and the physical exhaustion starts to mimic the heavy, "leaden" feeling of clinical depression. It is a dangerous crossover. Here is how I managed to get through these last few days without letting the darkness take over completely. 1. Radical Acceptance (And Lowering the Bar) The moment I realized this was the flu,...